Day 6: Sticks and Stones

 That whole “sticks and stones” rhyme from childhood doesn’t work in the adult world. Words, indeed, can hurt us.

Do you have a not-so-gentle way with words? Pray and ask God for help in how you speak to your partner. If you need an extra reminder, write “Speak kindly” on sticky notes and place around the house, in the car

Proverbs 15:4 - Gentle words are a tree of life; a deceitful tongue crushes the spirit.


Comments

Post a Comment

Popular posts from this blog

Day 7: Getting Hit by the Same Train

 What kind of an idiot does that? Bad enough to get hit by a train once. But wouldn’t the pain of that keep you from getting too close to the edge again? Judgmental headline reading comes easy to me. This story provided low-hanging fruit. The specifics don’t matter now. It’s the pattern that stands out.  Over and over and over again. Same result. “What kind of an idiot repeatedly steps across the edge to be hit by a train, you ask? Who doesn’t learn from pain when they experience it? Those are great questions—for you!”    How often do I get hit by the same train in my own house? Same sloppy words. Same defensive posture. Same behavior that creates the same negative result.  I had to think: Instead of using my energy to judge the dude who kept running into trains, maybe ask God to help me start avoiding some of my own.  But God, can’t I at least ask, who gets hit twice by a REAL train?  Action points:     What’s one marital “train” you’d ...
Read more

The idea of mindfulness.

  The idea of mindfulness or being mindful is complete engagement in the present moment.  It is a state where you are not thinking, reflecting, judging or deciding, but are instead simply experiencing the things currently in your available experience.  In many ways people are largely unaware of our present moment, and often operate on “auto-pilot” to some degree. The auto-pilot mode is our default mode of operation.  Even when we find ourselves in a pleasurable quiet moment we automatically begin to daydream about others, plan/worry about the future or ruminate about the past.  We miss living in the present moment because we fail to pay attention to it.  Mindfulness is about waking up to the present moment and paying attention to our experience.  Learning mindfulness is not difficult; however, it is difficult to remember to do it.
Read more

Day 2 : The power of Affirmation.

 Flattery is throwing in a compliment for your own gain, for actually what you are after in the other person. “out of the abundance of the heart the mouth speaks” (Matthew 12:34). When you’re honest, what lies beneath that sarcasm, snark, or passive aggression? If you mess up in this area, don’t be afraid to say, “You know what, that was really wrong of me. Would you please forgive me?” Or “Can I rephrase that? Because I do care about you.” Affirmation is speaking a word of truth about a wonderful characteristic/ quality or ability of that other person for the purpose of building them up and lifting their spirit. Proverbs 15:1: A gentle answer deflects anger,  but harsh words make tempers flare.
Read more